An Essay lead to acceptance to 7 IVY League schools including Harvard, Princeton, Brown, Columbia, Penn, Dartmouth, Cornell

From: Luke Kenworthy

Source: New York Times

The soft thumping of my dad's heart provided a small degree of  solace as I cried with my head on his chest. I was in fifth  grade. He had just told me that my mom, having been attacked by  her boyfriend, was in the hospital. I remember being surprised  with myself, surprised that I would be sad after all she had  done. This was the same person who, when I was eight, threw a  drunken party at our house for teens younger than I am now. This  was the same person who would disappear after spending nights at  the bar, the person who went to jail for trying to strangle my  dad in an inebriated stupor. She had not been a part of my life  for over a year since my dad received sole custody; I thought I  had closure, that I was ready to move on. Yet, hot tears still  ran down my cheek as I imagined her swollen face and the bruises  on her arms.

I had always been shy as a kid and the absence of my mom  exacerbated this problem as I tried to unhealthily suppress my  insecurities and fill her absence with others' approval. In sixth  grade, I constantly sought the attention of a group of kids who,  in turn, bullied me. Consequently, when I switched schools going  into seventh grade, I was shy and timid, afraid to engage with  new people. I pictured myself near the bottom of a rigid social  hierarchy. The next year, I started to branch out more, but  inside, I remained obsessed with how others perceived me.

Entering high school, I would spend hours at a time thinking  about my insecurity and talking through memories of my mom with  my dad. During this time, I would always remember how I had  stared numbly into the ripples of my dad's shirt as a fifth  grader. I could never forget that feeling of helplessness, but  with repeated reflection, I began to understand this moment in a  different way. Given her circumstances — raised by an abusive,  alcoholic father and a neglectful mother; involved in several  dysfunctional relationships with controlling men; drinking to  numb the injustices of life, but then realizing it was too late  to stop — I have no way of knowing if my life would be any  different from hers.

For the first time, I began to understand an idea that has since  granted me freedom: I cannot walk in my mom's shoes, and thus, no  one else can truly walk in mine. The way others perceive me is  inherently inaccurate, so I do not need to concern myself with  what others think. This realization provided me the freedom to  become untethered from the approval of others, finally at ease  with myself.

I started to open up. Throughout high school, I began talking to  others about ideas that fascinated me, like space travel and  philosophy, rather than frantically searching for common ground.  I quit football, realizing that I largely participated for the  status it brought me, and joined cross country, because I  genuinely enjoy running. I started holding the door open for my  classmates almost every morning, greeting them as they arrived at  school, hoping to brighten their day. I became engaged in my role  on student council, which paid off when I was elected student  body president. Even then, it wasn't the role itself that I found  meaningful, but the way I could use it to help others. The basis  of my friendships shifted from validation seeking to mutual,  genuine respect.

As I listened to my dad's heartbeat that night, my mind filled  with anger and sorrow. However, in hindsight, I am thankful for  the lessons I learned from my mother; the pain I felt was a  necessary step in the process of becoming the person I am today,  someone who is unafraid to express himself.

 

A good essay lead to Columbia University

From: Zöe Sottile

Source: New York Times

 

The most exciting part was the laptop.

My mom grabbed the thick envelope out of my hands and read off the amenities associated with the Tang Scholarship to Phillips Academy: full tuition for all four years, a free summer trip, $20 a week for me to spend on all the Cheetos and nail polish my heart desired, and finally, a free laptop.

I had never had a computer of my own before, and to me the prospect symbolized a world of new possibilities. I was the only student from my public middle school I knew to ever go to an elite boarding school, and it felt like being invited into a selective club. My first week at Andover, dazed by its glamour and newness, I fought my way to the financial aid office to pick up the laptop; I sent my mom a photo of me grinning and clutching the cardboard box. Back in my dorm room, I pulled out my prize, a heavy but functional Dell, and marveled at its sleek edges, its astonishing speed.

But the love story of my laptop came clamoring to a halt. In the library, as I stumbled to negotiate a space to fit in, I watched my friends each pull out a MacBook. Each was paper-thin and seemingly weightless. And mine, heavy enough to hurt my back and constantly sighing like a tired dog, was distinctly out of place. My laptop, which I had thought was my ticket to the elite world of Andover, actually gave me away as the outsider I was.

For a long time, this was the crux of my Andover experience:always an outsider. When I hung out with wealthier friends, I was disoriented by how different their lives were from mine. While they spent summers in Prague or Paris, I spent mine mining the constellation of thrift stores around New Haven. The gap between full-scholarship and full-pay felt insurmountable.

But I also felt like an outsider going to meetings for the full-scholarship affinity group. My parents attended college and grew up wealthier than I did, giving me cultural capital many of my full-scholarship friends never had access to. Moreover, I’m white and could afford occasional concert tickets or sparkly earrings. The laptop, carried by all full-scholarship students and coded with hidden meanings, pivoted my friends’ understandings of me. At home, I grew up middle class, then became the privileged prep school girl. But at Andover, suddenly, I was poor. Trying to reconcile these conflicting identities, I realized how complex and mutable class is. My class is connected to my parents’ income, but it’s also rooted in cultural knowledge and objects that are charged with greater meaning.

Which brings me back to the laptop: in the middle of my senior fall, my exhausted Dell broke and I couldn’t afford another. When I managed to borrow a slim Mac from my school, I felt the walls around me reorient. I hoped that now I wouldn’t have to think about the electric web of privilege and power every time I sent an email. Instead, I felt a new anxiety: I worried when I sat in the magnificent dining hall with my beautiful computer thatI had lost an important part of my identity.

When I started at Andover, these constant dueling tensions felt like a trap: like I would never be comfortable anywhere. (The school sensed it too, and all full-financial aid students now receive MacBooks.) But maybe it’s the opposite of a trap. Maybe I’m culturally ambidextrous, as comfortable introducing a speaker on the stage of Andover’s century-old chapel as getting my nose pierced in a tattoo parlor in New Haven. My hyperawareness of how my Dell hid my privilege and how my Mac hid my financial need pushed me to be aware of what complicated stories were hiding behind my classmates’ seemingly simple facades. I am a full-scholarship student who benefits from cultural, socioeconomic and racial privilege: my story isn’t easy, but it’s still mine.

 

 

 

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